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 Revered Chaotic's Shout into the Cosmos

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Revered Chaotic
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Male
Number of posts : 645
Age : 30
Location : Purgatory, Texas
Honors : Photobucket
Registration date : 2008-04-30

OOC Character Profile
Name: Szadek Karthro
Race: Divine Parun

PostSubject: Revered Chaotic's Shout into the Cosmos   Thu May 10, 2012 1:37 am

So here it is... to start it out, I have this itch behind my heart that I just can't get out any other way than I know how; on our beloved forums.

There are alot of stupid things I've done in my life. I couldn't list them all here on RPGS for the simple fact that the internet in general is not. large enough to house my flaws. however... all these flaws are petty. There are a few...a very few things in life that I can honestly say I regret.

In 2010, I was convicted of a crime I didn't commit. I served two and a half years in the care of the Ohio Department of Rehabilitation and Corrections. Through-out this time, a very close friend of mine from RPGFO kept the mail and phonelines open for me. This friend gave time away from her own struggles to be sure that I had someone that I knew cared.

When I got out of prison, we dated for a while, and in a moment of revelation, I proposed marriage..and she said yes.

But I was immature. I was stupid; mad at everyone but her, and taking it out on the only person that ever trutly cared and was there for me. I said some hurtful things, acted like an infant, and then ran her from my life.

Now, in a point in life where my largest tribulations are staring me in the face and laughing at my mortality, I find it difficult to tap into the inherent magick within us all to meet my challenges.

What have I done? I deserve to be on rock bottom. But perhaps there is another who can pull me out of this dark abyss in which I've thrown myself.

Maybe I should give up. Maybe I should survive, like I am so well-known for. Maybe I should continue to hide the tears that are shed each morning as I wake up screaming, swinging, and grasping for my one lifeline away from my nightmares...

"Get a job" is an easy thing to say when you don't have two felony numbers, a parole officer, and an instability that causes you to emotionally fall apart at random times out of the blue...

________________

-[Welcome to Purgatory]-
-[Revered Chaotic]-


Last edited by MiyaTheWriter on Thu May 10, 2012 10:08 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Needing spaces)
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miyathewriter
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Number of posts : 21
Age : 26
Location : In my own story...
Registration date : 2012-05-06

PostSubject: Re: Revered Chaotic's Shout into the Cosmos   Thu May 10, 2012 7:11 am

DARN!! I wanted the honors of kicking this off:P

Oh well, here is a piece I wrote a couple of days ago...Just me venting because my family hates me being online so much...I pretty much grew up online...



Originally written: 2012-05-06 13:37:27    
Title: Love yourself and friends should support you 
We Are All UNIQUE!!
I love writing and RPGing...I spend 70+ of my day online and my family hates it...BUT I LOVE WHAT I DO!! I write and RPG. If I'm writing anythng be it a random muse, RPG plot for me and a partner, story or a book...I AM HAPPY!! I WOULD DIE if anything happened to my laptop...Just the other day my laptop had a glitch and said reinstall Work word proccessor..I flipped out...shut it down and restarted my laptop...and it worked just fine and everything was still there(thank god) I then prceeded to CRY...I was so scared and relieved!! DON'T hate me cause I'm a internet junkie...support me, cuase it's where my dreams are at...This piece was written by: Miya


Originally written: 2012-03-30 07:22:07     
Written/Owned by: Miya
Title: Random piece(Unknown title)

...And she sits here, a handful of hair tightly grasped in her hand as tears puddle in her eyes and fall to the ground. A sense of life has been stirred and she is reminded by everything in life who helped her get this far. Her tears are of joy and pain from her past. She weeps not of sadness, for she is finally on the right track in life. She may have a long road ahead of her filled with pain and trouble, but she knows she has support every step of the way and refuses to back down.

(This is just the way I feel day to day.)


Written back in the beginning of April
Written/Owned by: Miya
Title: When I had lost everything, even my Faith...

A few years ago I plunged into the dark hole of seclusion, I became depressed, thought no one cared about me. I had of course prayed several times for help. They seem to go unanswered...many nights would I cry myself to sleep, the pain of my depression caused me to lose my Faith. I soon begun to think suicidal thoughts, even put knives to my wrist and ropes around my neck....I knew what I was doing would solve nothing. I would put them away and go cry till my pillow became soaked with tears, sometimes even falling alseep. I went many years fearing people and the outside world, fearing what judgement they would bring. I went downhill, death wishes became a daily thing. Years later I discovered online friends that I fit in with a few I still have 3-4 years later. I found love, only to lose it to arguements between the two of us. The relationship seemed to have wake me up to the world. I have now beat depression back in november of 2011, and finished my first short story, I have lost weight, I feel alive!! I am currently searching for a jobb and trying to fit into the world once again! My Faith has been restored, life rediscovered, accomplishments made.... All thanks to one guy which seems to have COMPLETELY turned my life around. So to him I say for the millionth time, THANK YOU!





Last edited by MiyaTheWriter on Thu May 10, 2012 10:29 am; edited 3 times in total (Reason for editing : Added Title and added written pieces)
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